Responsibility for your Energy

This year, some very close friends of ours found themselves caught up in mayhem, absolute and utter mayhem. It forced them all to make hard decisions and sacrifices and these hardships ultimately extended outward to their circle of friends and their communities. 

The decisions of few forced the compromise of others, on many different levels. Sides had to be chosen, secrets had to be kept, compassion and sympathies had to be given even at times when they were in short supply. Families were broken apart and lives were changed forever. It's a hardship that I'd never wish on any group of friends or on any marriage.

As the months have gone by and wounds are being replaced by scars, we find ourselves at a juncture in these hard circumstances. We have spent many nights both shedding and holding back tears, we've felt all of the feels on so many different levels, and we've supported and held one another up when the times were hardest. When is enough, enough? 

When do we begin moving forward to adjust our lives to accommodate the trauma that even those farthest removed have experienced. How does one lift herself up in a way that doesn't forget the past, but tucks it away in a place that it no longer consumes the energy in the room? 

The situation this year weighed so incredibly heavy on the hearts of so many, and it's time to move forward. How can I do this and still be a good friend to those who's lives were left in shambles? How can I be loving and compassionate for those who have lost so much? And can I continue that support without falling victim to toxic energy that so quickly fills the space whenever the subject is present? 

Looking forward and beyond the first half of 2018, I plan to make it my responsibility to change the tone, to lift spirits in a way that overshadows the pain, to count blessings, to pray and thank God for bearing the weight of all of the wrong that has been done, to hold up my friends and share my strength in their times of need, to genuinely love and care for those I am closest to, to take in each and every moment, and to live life with intention and compassion and kindness and thoughtfulness. 

I cannot change the past and the pain that was brought down on my loved ones, but I can change the attitude, the tone, the energy in the room and I pray that others will feel the love as well.